We have had Alexandria living with us for a year. She's 13 now, lots of fun, and I'm enjoying helping to raise her. I also like having a coffee partner.
Some time ago in this forum I complained about our crappy coffee pot and how I can only make a few thimbles of coffee at a time. Today it turned into a good lesson, maybe the best one I can teach.
Whenever I'm making coffee I always ask Alex if she's like some. I have to be cognizant of how much I take to make sure that there is enough to share. It is not like I can't make more, but I have to be careful of how I personally tap our micro-pot.
Today I asked her if she'd like some and offered to pour her a cup, but she likes to overdose on the creamer, so she elected to make her own. She got down the big coffee cup and made her morning joe.
When I go to make mine I was able to coax a scant dribble of liquid out of the pot. I got distracted and went to do something else.
When I returned, her cup sat on the table, cold and 3/4 full. It was time for a discussion.
I told her that she needs to be more aware of the world around her, and sensitive to the needs of others. She needs to inquire with others if they need anything, if they would like to share, if there is anything she can offer to them. I think this is really important.
It is especially bad because she took it, and didn't drink it. There are drowsy kids in other countries that would appreciate that cup of coffee. Not only did she take it all, she wasted it, and that's exactly the opposite of how I want her to turn out.
It is not how she was raised. One time she was visiting her sister's house and at all of her sister's popsicles, all of them. It is almost like she didn't want her sister to have them. This is how it worked in that house I guess. I saw this all the time. If one kid could take from the others, hurt the others or advance their situation by throwing the other under the bus, then that's how it went. This is partially why she is here with us.
The best lesson she can ever receive is to understand that she lives in a world surrounded by other people. She should never worry about how much she didn't get, but should worry if others have enough.
If she takes my advice she'll definitely be a weirdo.
And we had three pieces of bread and two heels today and we both wanted a sandwich. I gave her two good pieces and I ate the crusty end piece. I'm teaching by example.
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